Loch Ness

The star of the film is the loch. The English should feel proud. Producer Tim Bevan, director John Henderson, actress Joely Richardson (fiery propietress of local pub) and veteran stage actor Ian Holm (codger in row boat with dog) came to Scotland one September and brought out the best in the weather and themselves.

Ted Danson, as a laid-back zoologist from California, has slipover charm, expensive dental arhitecture and a smile that walks by itself. "I'm a joke," he explains. "I'm the guy who chases loony toons." In this case, Nessie.

He arrives with state-of-the-art sonar equipment, fits it into a fishing boat in two ticks and starts trawling for prehistoric mammals.

The story, by John Fusco from Vermont, is a fable for romantics. Richardson's daughter, played with admirable lack of fuss by nine-year-old Kirsty Graham, has second sight and knows about sea kelpies, not that she's telling. If Alexander Mackendrick or Bill Forsyth had been in charge, the details would have been sharper and the support cast have genuine homegrown personality.

As it is, the scenery and Miss Richardson steal the show. The rest is gentle, predictable, slow and safe, with a laudable message - "There are some things that are meant to be left alone" - and an ending that insults the intelligence of self-respecting scientists everywhere.