Home

Sweet enough to rot the minds of seven-year-old girls and confusing enough to reboot the thought processes of 11-year-old gamers, Home is what you don't want in an animated feature - a bit too soft and a bunch too muddled.

There is an alien race called The Booves who look like distant cousins of The Minions from Despicable Me, tennis ball squeezies that change colour depending on their mood. They talk mini-mall ("Best day ever!"and "Best planet ever for hiding!") which would be ridiculed as so-not-now in Junior High.

The Booves are famous for running away. When news reaches them that the predatory Big Blacks have entered their solar system they head for safety - in this case, Earth. They have vacuum machines that suck up people, like a mega Dyson, and dump them in Happy Humantown, which looks like an episode from The Truman Show.

Anti hero Oh (voiced by Jim Parsons from The Big Bang Theory) is one of those cringe making optimists who doesn't realise that everyone finds him boring and won't go to his parties.

"I don't fit in," he says. "I fit out."

True.

He bumps into the only human teenager left in the world. Her name is Tip (Rihanna on vocals). She's half Caribbean, half barley sugar. She has a cat called Pig. And they are looking for Mom.

That's about it. Except the nasties turn up and the captain of The Booves orders a retreat. The Big Blacks may look like metallic starfish magnified 400 times but when you get to know them they aren't so bad.

The script isn't smart enough, nor funny enough, to retain a gnat's attention. Compared with The Lego Movie it doesn't make it to the starting line although as a marketing devise for soundtrack sales, featuring Rihanna and Jennifer Lopez, it has possibilities.

Kids fresh out of Pampers won't have a clue what is going on but the colours aren't threatening, Pig is naughty but nice and Tip won't take Oh for an answer.

"I cannot wait to meet my Mom," she says.

You're on your own, babe.